Aston Villa supporters for months now have been hoping their team’s defence would finally stop allowing teams to leave Villa Park with three points. The home of the claret and blue was a fortress once upon a time, but in recent seasons visiting teams have started to see getting three points at Villa Park as a piece of cake.
Defensive Woe
Aston Villa suffered their eighth loss this season at home to Liverpool at the weekend. Once again, Villa were looking good for the win until their defense, true to form, managed to manufacture a defeat from the jaws of victory.
The Villa faithful decided enough was enough and decided to act.
Evidence
Below is photographic evidence of a Villa fan invading the Liverpool coach in the name of payback, as well as exclusive photos from Liverpool’s training ground the next day.
The Villa fan on this covert mission was the infamous ‘Villa Bitch’ of the Holte End. Some Holte Enders have suggested that Villa Bitch is on the payroll of the notorious Villa crime boss ‘MV’ Mini Villan whom MOMS exposed last year , although these rumours are unconfirmed.
Missing Items
After tampering with the player’s bottles of water and taking some souvenirs, ‘VB’ as the recent Villa official match programme called her, left a Villa scarf on the coach as a calling card.
Murmurs out of the Anfield camp since suggest Steven Gerard is missing his wallet, Raheem Sterling is missing his PSP Playstation and Stewart Downing seems to have been especially targeted with the ex-Villa player missing a Rolex, his car keys, house keys, i-phone, Macbook, over night Louis Vuitton bag and also his electric toothbrush.
Liverpool FC are said to be monitoring ebay in an attempt to catch the Sutton Coldfield Lion’s Club (which Villa Bitch is a member of) selling the items online to raise money for an end of season p**s up.
Worse was to come for the Liverpool players the next day in training at their Melwood training ground, when the results of what the Villa Bitch had put into their bottles of water, started to become apparent.
Side Effects
First to feel the effects was Fabio Borini, who broke down clutching his stomach in agony after just five-minutes of shooting practise.
Initially, it was suspected the Italian forward had just eaten some dodgy home-cooked Salmon pasta the night before.
The Liverpool players laughed it up at his expense, until ten-minutes later they heard Luis Suarez let out a scream.
Alarmingly, the Uruguayan striker shat himself in a somewhat explosive style in the middle of a five-a-side game.
Soon, the rest of the Liverpool squad were exploding out from both ends and they all had to be whisked away by coach from Melwood to the Royal Liverpool University Hospital, where the entire team was kept over night for observation.
The moral of the story is Aston Villa supporters are not going to take to giving up three points at Villa Park anymore this season, without there being severe consequences.
Fulham, Sunderland and Chelsea, you have been warned.
UTV
PS – Liverpool FC – can Villa Bitch have her scarf back please?
*A Venglos View is a satirical look at Villa. Check out other Venglos Views
Follow MOMS on twitter at @oldmansaid
LFC here, brilliant and fun article, the Suarez pic is classic. Beware, Anfield Cow will strike back next season (if you get outta de shite) nicking the wheels off the villas coach and leaving it on bricks!!
doits1 There was a few Villa and LFC fans who thought it was a real story, and they were debating on twitter in all seriousness, if it was true or not. Some of their twitter comments are pretty funny. I mean did they really think the pictures of the Liverpool players were REAL, in terms of having food poisoning?!
As a LFC fan can I just ask why she didnt just take Downing back I mean come on would have done us a favour lol
fred001005 Ha – the problem is, if we took him back, he’d get lynched. He arrived to Villa from Middlesborough on crutches…and that’s how a lot of fans would have liked him to leave!
Hi There …. Well What an article ..I love this think it Hilarious and it is Brilliant Piece of writing from the Legendary Myoldmansaid .. I have never laughed as much in years, and i think its just one of the best articles made for Humour and laughter ha ha oh it certainky does that ha ha .I was quite sh0cked how some though actualy believed it was true..ha ha Well thats even more funny ..ha ha I would like to say thankyou for including me in this Humerous article once again .xxVB
The funniest thing about these ‘A Venglos View’ articles are the people getting worked up on twitter because they actually believe them to be true. Yes, people thought that ‘Villa Bitch’ went on the Liverpool team coach and stole things and poisoned their players! Priceless. It gives the the articles a whole other level of humour. There’s an important lesson in there to people who tend to read papers like The Sun and Daily Mail – do question whether what your reading is true and consider the paper’s agenda and motivation.
MyOldManSaid
Funniest thing i think is how we robbed you of three points at your home ground………… NOW THAT WAS FUNNY :o)
ianw77 MyOldManSaid Haha – laugh it up. We’re claiming the 4-3 aggregate win for the season!